Me: Maybe get online tonight?
Z: Maybe. but not likely
Me: ok I won’t wait up.
Z: yeah, that’s best

Fucker. We sit in class and he gets me worked up. Tells me that he wants to cum in my mouth. Pour his cum over my tongue and fill all the spaces in my mouth. He wants me to beg him to cum on my face. He wants to fuck me until I cry for him, so he can wipe away my tears and soothe me, tell me I’m his good girl.

He makes me want him. He makes me crave him like food and water. Late at night, he calls and asks me, “Who do you belong to?” because he knows that I will betray myself and admit it. “You.” I answer. My fingers pushed under my panties, slowly stroking my clit to the sound of his voice. He tells me how he wants to push his cock inside my cunt from behind, holding on to a handful of hair and biting down into my shoulder. As he verbally violates me- he directs the fingers on my clit, harder….faster…. push your fingers in your cunt…. and he continues.

I feel his cock inside me, sliding through my pussy. Gripping down on him, and soaking him with the liquid sex that he demands from my body. It’s been so long since I’ve felt him- but I know the feel of his body. I know the smell of his skin. I can rely on the intimate familiarity he has with my body.

I want you to cum for me. He instructs me. He wants to hear me, grunting and gasping for air. He wants to hear me cry out. His name. Again and again. I’m his, over and over. I tried to walk away- but he knows I am here. He punishes me for my insolence and keeps me at a distance. For your own good babygirl, he tells me. But I can hear it in his voice, he knows that he owns me.

I cum hard. My body shaking. My soaked fingers, stroking and rubbing my clit while my body jerks. I hear him moaning, pleased. I love you baby. You are a good girl. And I am happy. He loves me, he adores me.

That was days ago. Today, he is distant again. Not likely, he says when I ask him to make time for me tonight. He has the time, he just refuses to give it. He gives me space.

Just enough rope…

to tie myself up.